The effectiveness of marriage counseling is determined by at least two things:

1. the therapist’s expertise and methods, and

2. the couples’ willingness and efforts at improving their relationship.

The role of the marriage therapist is crucial to the success of the counseling. A veteran therapist once told me: “In this profession, the older you are, the more valuable you become,” and I have found that to be true. I believe my years of experiences are what give me great value to those I counsel: my life experiences (I’m in my 60’s), my own marriage experiences (married to the same woman for 4 decades, loving each other through the good, the bad, and everything in between!), and my counseling experiences (nearly 4 decades as a pastoral counselor and then a professional counselor).

While many therapists say they work with couples, most have a mixed caseload and little training in couples’ work. My counseling practice is focused solely on marriage counseling and I have been trained by some of the best practitioners in the most effective marriage counseling models. (See my About page for more information)

I believe, though, my best “training” has been my work with married couples. As I have helped couples work through a broad spectrum of relationship-crushing issues, I have gained great understanding of what makes a marriage healthy and happy and I know what it takes to get a couple to a better place in their marriage.

Any approach to couples counseling can be effective, but I believe marriage counseling is not one-size-fits all. While I have certain models I rely on to guide my work with couples, and I have tried-and-true processes to guide them to create the marriage they want, I take an eclectic approach to my counseling to tailor-make the counseling experience for the couple’s specific issues and needs.

I am driven by a passion to inspire and equip couples to enjoy a life-long love!

I love to help people love better!

Even though I can say I have helped hundreds of couples love better and enjoy healthier marriages, relationship transformation doesn’t happen in my office alone, no matter how much time a couple spends there. The real work is how the couple implements the changes experienced and explored in the sessions, in between the sessions!

But it is not only an investment of their effort; pragmatically, it is also an investment of their resources: time and money. It requires a scheduling and financial commitment. I recognize that time and money are precious commodities, and only the couple can decide how to allocate those resources; but I have seen over and over again that the more significant their investment (effort and resources), the greater the change they experience.

My challenge to couples is this: one way or another, you are going to invest your effort and resources into your relationship . . but how much? and to what result?

Do you want to keep the same level of investments as you are currently maintaining, only to get the same results of mediocrity, dissatisfaction, and/or conflict? Do you only want to make a little more investment of effort and resources, just enough to relieve the current pain, but not obtain a long-term cure? Or is the pain and despair great enough to motivate you to do whatever it takes to get to a much better place?

Because the couples’ needs vary, and each couples’ investment levels differ, I offer three types of counseling options:

Traditional

Extended

Intensive

To determine which one is best for your relationship, here’s a helpful equation to consider: the greater the need, the greater the investment. For those who want to take their marriage from good to great or they’re in a slump they can’t seem to navigate their way out of, the Traditional option might suffice. For those who are struggling (in a cycle of conflict or distancing), the Extended or Intensive option is what I recommend. For those who are in crisis (from severe neglect, a threatened divorce, or the aftermath of an affair), I would strongly recommend the Intensive option.

Having said all of that . . your relationship may not be in a crisis but you want the day-long or multi-day option, due to ease of schedule or to turbo-charge the counseling process OR your relationship may be in crisis, but your time and financial resources limit you to the Traditional or Extended option. Any of these reasons make sense, only you can determine which option best meets your needs and resources.

Please review the following to determine which option seems best for your relationship and your level of investment at this time: